Friendship in the West & Friendship in Islam Essay

It is natural for tidy sum to form acquaintances with opposites whom they interact with on a regular footing. Friendships send away be formed through growth up in the same neighbourhood, meeting at school, college, university, social gatherings and via a number of other activities.Friendship is more than or lessthing common amongst people, however there be different c erstptions of it. Some common conceptions include the pas time lifters go bug proscribed ever so stick by your side, you can always rely on a friend, you can speak freely to your friend and tell them your problems, friends same(p) you for who you argon, etc. When people cipher personal problems such as disputes with their family members or if they occupy advice they usu comp allowelyy turn to their friends.Friendship in the WestFriendship in the West is based on benefit. Friends come together on the basis of mutual inte liberalisation, so they entrust go to the cinema, parties and clubbing together. They talk just ab come to the fore the opposite finish freely to individually other and hide severally others secrets dis piecetle if they involve evil actions. They often gain comfort in backbiting and winging about other people who they dont like. Unfortunately roughly genus genus Moslems hunt the westerly nonion of friendship as they follow the gathering or else than to looking at to Islam for solutions.Due to the particular that friendship is based on benefit in the West, it is easy for people to fault out with each other, dumbfound rows and eve become enemies. This happens when their interests conflict and can be everywhere petty things such as non going for a wickedness out with them or larger things such as betrayal. In more cases people even talk negatively about slightly of their friends in front of others and even betray them by having affairs with their wife, sisters or girlfriend.Friends even become status symbols, so people long to hang out with a particular crowd to look cool. Often crowds have leadership with egos, so staying on the right side of indisputable people is all important(p) if you want to be accepted. For some this totality and soul sucking up to them, for others it marrow undertaking actions to make them think youre cool.Friendship in the West is based on using each other. The proof of this can be seen in the fact that when friends became unusable they drift apart. Typically, if psyches friend was to suddenly change and stop clubbing, partying and drooling over the opposite sex at every opportunity they would start treating them differently and normally break out with them.Especially if this person begins to account them when they argon wrong and hint them upon their actions repeatedly. As an ex ample if some ane begins to practise Islam and stops committing Haram and advises his friends to do the same. Those with the Western concept of friendship would change their attitude towarfargonds them and they would be distanced and nevertheless on occasion spoken to. The campaign for this is that it there is no more benefit in their eyes to keep a close relationship with them, in fact it completely contradicts their lust for pleasure as when the person speaks about Islam it is seen as an attack on their lifestyle.Friendship in Western societies is normally trumped-up(prenominal) as the society is founded on greed, individualism and following lusts. Friendship in Islam is true as it is based on sincerity, trust and Taqwa (piety).Friendship in IslamIslam recognises that a Muslim willing naturally spend more meter with certain people and be more comfortable with them in face lifting their personal problems and issues. This does non recollect in any way that the rest of the Muslims atomic number 18 non their blood familiars and sisters whom they passionest, rather all that it federal agency that they will be closer to certain people than others just as people be usually cl oser to their family than others.Islam recognises that friends have a strong influence on people and that their environment will affect the strength of their relationship with Allah (Subhanahu wa taaala). The vaticinator (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said,A person follows the Deen (way of life) of his close friend hence let each of you look carefully at whom he chooses for friends TirmidhiA Muslim should choose friends that will advise him and remind him of Allah (Subhanahu wa taaala) rather than lure him to the path of Shaytan. It has also been narrated that our friends in the Dunya (world) will be our friends in the Akhira (afterlife). It is therefore vital for a Muslim to choose nigh(a) friends.The slam mingled with two Muslim friends is such that they would confide in each other, help each other in times of choose and streng therefore each others commitment to the Deen of Allah (Subhanahu wa taaala). The vaticinator (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) encouraged for Muslims who h ave cacoethes for each other not to keep it to themselves.It has been narrated by al-Bukhari in al-Adaabul-Mufrad (no. 191) that Allahs Messenger (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said,If ace of you fucks his brother for Allahs sake, then let him tell him since it causes familiarity to endure and firmly establishes love.Abu Huraira narrated that the prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said,You will not enter Paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Shall I not guide you to something which if you carry out you will love one another. Spread as-Salaam amongst yourselves. MuslimFriendship in Islam is not based on using each other on the contrary, helping each other to stay away from the Haram is fundamental to it. How could someone watch his brother burn without doing anything to save him? A person who did that would be ones worst enemy rather than a friend. and so Muslims always check and advise each other. The visionary (SallAllahu alaihi wasa llam) said,Each of you is the mirror of his brother, so if he sees any fault in him he should wipe it away from him. TirmidhiThis means the purpose of confiding secrets to each other wouldnt be as in the Western value where people confide their secrets to feel sizeable knowing that they will not be a comeback. Rather in Islam we confide our secrets to our friends to seek their sincere advice and help. So a Muslim will ask his friends about issues relating to marriage, problems within his family, troubles he feels at work or fears that he has.Friendship has rules in Islam unlike in the West to chew up them especially when they are ill, to inquire about their family, feeding them when they are hungry, aid to their contends, keeping their private affairs to yourself and sharing your wealth with them without hesitation. It is related that Ibn Umar (ra) was looking about from right to left in the presence of the visionary (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam), who asked the reason for doing so. Ibn Umar replied, There is someone dear to me and I am searching for him, exactly do not see him. The Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) then said,Umar bin Al-Khattab (ra) said, Encountering your brothers lifts all grief. If Allah blesses you with proficient relations with another Muslim, hold fast to it.Rule of friendship with non-MuslimsAs Muslims living in the West we interact with non-Muslims on a daily basis whether at work, University, college or in society at large. It is incorrect for us to cut ourselves completely from them and live in isolation. We should conception at building relationships with them in send to give them Dawa to embrace Islam. Therefore we should have them as acquaintances, however this does not mean that we are allowed to have them as close friends, as Allah (Subhanahu wa taaala) saysO you who believe, bow out not into intimacy those outside your ranks they will not fail to corrupt you. TMQ Al-Imran 118Not taking them as close friends means t hat you dont percent with them your innermost thoughts and feelings. For no matter how intumesce you know them, they reject Allah (Subhanahu wa taaala) and His Messenger (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam). The bond of Iman is even stronger than that of kinship. An example of this can be seen after the great battle of Badr, the Quraysh prisoners of war were bought to the Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) who assigned them to the custody of individual Muslims. The Messenger (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said, Treat them closely. Amongst the prisoners was Abu Aziz ibn U mayr, the brother of Musab ibn Umayr (ra).Abu Aziz narrates what happened, I was among a group of AnsaarWhenever they had lunch or dinner they would give me bread and dates to eat in obedience to the Prophets instruction to them to treat us well. My brother, Musab ibn Umayr, passed by me and said to the man belongings me prisoner, Tie him firmly His mother (i.e. Musabs own mother) is a woman of great wealth and maybe s he would ransom him for you. Abu Aziz ibn Umayr could not believe his ears. Astonished, he turned to Musab and asked My brother, is this your instruction concerning me? Musab ibn Umayr (ra) replied, He is my brother, not you pointing to the Ansaari Sahabi holding him, affirming that in the battle in the midst of the Haq and the Batil, the bonds of Iman are stronger than the ties of kinship.Prohibition of backbiting, slander, look up to, jealousy & grudgesThe relationship of friendship is one of trust as a penny-pinching Muslim is trustworthy and not deceitful, betraying or a vilifyr. In truth this makes the love between friends in Islam stronger than friendship according to Western values as there is no constant thinking about whether your friend is speaking ill of you to other people or whether they are having a hidden relationship with your sister or wife.Islam has prohibited backbiting and slander and and then removing the cause of suspicion and doubt amongst people. All ah (Subhanahu wa taaala) saysNeither backbite one another. Would one of you love to eat the flesh of his dead brother. You anathemise that (so abhor the other) And keep your duty to Allah. Lo Allah is Relenting, Merciful. Al-Hujarat 12It is narrated by Abu Dawud on the authority of genus genus Anas (RA), the Messenger of Allah saidOn the night of Isra I passed by some people who had copper nails and they were clawing their faces and chests with them. I asked Jibriel Who are these persons? He said These are the people who eat the flesh of human beings and disgrace them.Islam also forbids envy and jealousy which are the common causes of problems amongst friends in Western societies. The Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said,Do not have malice against a Muslim do not be envious of other Muslims do not go against a Muslim and forsake him. O the slaves of Allah (Subhanahu wa taaala) Be like brothers with each other. It is not violable for a Muslim to desert his brother for over thre e days. Sahih Muslim, TirmithiBelittling each other is more or less a pastime in the West. The Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said,The believer can do no worse than belittle his brother. Iyah Uloom ad DeenA Muslim should not hold grudges against another Muslim even if they are differing personalities. The Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) warned against this when he said,The gates of Paradise will be open on Mondays and on Thursdays, and every servant of Allah who associates nothing with Allah will be forgiven, pretermit for the man who has a grudge against his brother. About them it will be said storage area these two until they are conciliate delay these two until they are reconciled delay these two until they are reconciled. MuslimFriends should feel at exempt with each other without feeling inferior or superior. Egos must be tamed according to Islam. The Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said, A man is on a par with the Deen of his friend and there is no good in the fellowship of one who does not regard you as highly as himself. Iyah Uloom ad DeenConcealing faultsIt is important to conceal a friends faults, this does not mean that we ignore them it means that we advise them and help them overcome their shortcomings.Uqbah ibn amir narrated that the Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said,He who sees something which should be kept hidden and conceals it, it will be like the one who has brought to life a girl buried alive(predicate) Hadith 2292 Abu DawudAbu Hurayrah narrated that Allahs Apostle (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said,He who conceals (the faults) of a Muslim, Allah would conceal his faults in the world and in the Hereafter. Allah is at the back of a servant so long as the servant is at the back of his brother. Hadith 1245 MuslimGenerosity & Kindness communion wealth with others is greatly encouraged in Islam. This encourages trust and closeness amongst people. It is sometimes difficult for Muslims to grasp this principle espec ially when they are affected by Western society which promotes greed and selfishness. Giving someone something without expecting anything in degenerate is uncommon in the West even amongst friends. When the non-Muslims give each other presents such as on Birthdays, Christmas, New Years or when someone leaves the work place it is done more out of tradition and knowing that they will get something in return rather than sincerity.Imam Bukhari narrated that our beloved Messenger Muhammad (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) saidNone amongst you believes (truly) till one likes for his brother, that which he loves for his himself.Examples of this perspective towards others can be clearly seen in the confreres of the Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam).It is transmitted by Imam Ahmad, in Al-Bidayah, volume 3, page 228 that Anas (ra) narrated, When Abdur-Rahman ibn Auf (ra) immigrated to Medina, the Messenger of Allah (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) established brotherhood between him and Sad ibn A l-Ansari (ra). Afterwards Sad said to Abdur-Rahman ibn Auf, O my brother I am a monied person of Medina. Look Here is half of my wealth, take it I have 2 wives. I will divorce one of them whom you like more so that you may marry her. Abdur-Rahman ibn Auf replied, May Allah (Subhanahu wa taaala) thrive your family and wealth, just show me the way to the market so that I may make my fortune with my own hands.The Ansaar of Medina were extremely generous to their brothers, the Muhajireen from Makkah. Abu Hurairah (ra) inform that they once approached the Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) with the request that their orchards of palm trees should be distributed equally between the Muslims of Medina and the Muslims of Makkah. just the Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) was reluctant to put this heavy burden upon them. It was, however, decided that the Muhajireen would work in the orchards along with the Ansaar and the yield would be divided equally amongst them.Friends should have informality with each other so that they are not hesitant in asking for anything when in need. This can be seen from the example of the Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) and his dear friend Abu Ayyub al-Ansari. The Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) had stayed at his house when after arriving into Madina whilst he was waiting for the mosque to be built. The Prophet stayed in Abu Ayyubs house for nigh seven months until his mosque was completed on the open space where his camel had stopped. He then moved to the roots which were built around the mosque for himself and his family. He thus became a neighbour of his friend Abu Ayyub.Abu Ayyub continue to love the Prophet with all his heart and the Prophet also loved him dearly. There was no formality between them. The Prophet continued to regard Abu Ayyubs house as his own. The following anecdote tells a great deal about the relationship between them. Abu Bakr (ra) once left his house in the burning heat of the noonday sun and w ent to the mosque. Umar (ra) saw him and asked, Abu Bakr, what has brought you out at this hour? Abu Bakr said he had left his house because he was terribly hungry and Umar said that he had left his house for the same reason. The Prophet came up to them and asked What has brought the two of you out at this hour? They told him and he said, By Him in Whose hands is my soul, besides hunger has caused me to come out also. But come with me.They went to the house of Abu Ayyub al-Ansari. His wife opened the door and said, receive to the Prophet and whoever is with him.Where is Abu Ayyub? asked the Prophet. Abu Ayyub, who was working in a nearby palm grove, heard the Prophets voice and came hurriedly. Welcome to the Prophet and whoever is with him, he said and went on O Prophet of God, this is not the time that you usually come. (Abu Ayyub used to keep some food for the Prophet every day. When the Prophet did not come for it by a certain time, Abu Ayyub would give it to his family). You ar e right, the Prophet agreed. Abu Ayyub went out and cut a pack of dates in which there were matured and half aged dates.I did not want you to eat this, said the Prophet. Could you not have brought only the ripe dates? O Rasulullah, please eat from both the ripe dates (rutb) and the half ripe (busr). I shall slaughter an animal for you also.. If you are going to, then do not kill one that gives milk, cautioned the Prophet. Abu Ayyub killed a young goat, cooked half and barbecued the other half. He also asked his wife to bake, because she baked better he said. When the food was ready, it was placed before the Prophet and his two companions. The Prophet took a piece of meat and placed it in a loaf and said, Abu Ayyub, take this to Fatima. She has not tasted the like of this for days. When they had eaten and were satisfied, the Prophet said reflectively refined sugar and meat and busr and rutb Tears began to flow from his eyes as he continuedThis is a bountiful blessing about which you will be asked on the Day of judgment. If such comes your way, put your hands to it and say, Bismillah (In the name of God) and when you have destroyed say, Al hamdu lillah alladhee huwa ashbana wa anama alayna (Praise be to God Who has given us sufficiency and Who has shellowed his bounty on us). This is best. Iyah Uloom ad DeenIn putting others first, the Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) exhibit for us excellent examples. He (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) once entered a thicket with one of his companions and gathered two toothpicks, one of them crooked and the other unfeigned. He gave the smashing one to his companion, who said, O Messenger of Allah, you are more entitled to the straight one than I The Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) replied, When a friend accompanies a friend, if only for one hour of the day, he will be asked to account for his companionship, whether he fulfilled his duty to Allah therein or whether he neglected it. Iyah Uloom ad DeenOn another occ asion the Messenger of Allah (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) went out to a well in order to wash. Hudhayfa ibn al-Yaman took a robe and stood screening the Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) whilst he washed. Then Hudhayfa (ra) sat down to wash himself and Muhammad (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) took the robe and screened Hudhayfa (ra) from view. Hudhayfa objected saying, My father be your ransom, and my mother too O Messenger of Allah, do not do it Yet he (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) insisted on holding the robe and said, Each time two people are in company together, the dearer to Allah is he who is kinder to his companion Ihya Uloom ad DeenThe Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) also said, The companions whom Allah considers best are those who are best to their companions. Ahmad & TirmidhiGiving of gifts has also been recommended by the Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) and he explained that it creates love between people.It was report by al-Bukhari in al-Adaabul-Mufrad (no. 5 94) that Rasool-Allah (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) saidGive gifts and you will love one another.Kindness to our friends, helping them in need and consoling them in times of grief should become natural for us for everyone needs help, a shoulder to cry on and someone to share their joy.Ali ibn Abi Talib (ra) said, Pay attention to your brothers for they are your provision in this life and in the hereafter. Do you not listen to the cry of the people of the fire?So we have no one to intercede for us nor any dear friend Ash-Shuaraa 100-101Loving someone for the sake of AllahIn the West people love each other for the sake of material benefits whereas in Islam we are encouraged to love each other for the sake of Allah. This means that we would try actions with regards to each other that even contradict our personal interests in order aid a friend or further our relationship with them.It was reported by Muslim on the authority of Abu Hurairah (ra) that the Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasall am) saidA man went to visit a brother of his in another townsfolk and Allah deputed an angel to await him on his way, so when he came to him he said, Where are you going? He replied, I am going to visit a brother of mine in this town. He said, Have you done him some favour which you desire to be returned? He said, No, it is just that I love him for Allah, the Mighty and Magnificent. He said, Then I am a messenger sent by Allah to you (to inform you) that Allah loves you as you have loved him for Allahs sake.The Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) also said,Whoever would like to taste the sweetness of Iman (belief) then let him love a person only for Allahs sake AhmadIt was reported by Abu Dawud that Umar ibn al-Khattab narrated that the Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said,Indeed from the servants of Allah there are some who are not Prophets, yet they will be envied by the Prophets and the martyrs. It was asked, Who are they? That we may love them. He (SallAllahu alaihi wasa llam) said, They are people who have mutual love through light from Allah, not due to kinship or ancestry, their faces will be enlightened, upon pillars of light, they will not fear when the people fear, or regret when the people grieve.Then he (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) recitedNo doubt Verily, on the friends of Allah there is no fear nor shall they grieve TMQ 10 62In conclusion, it should be apparent that we cant live in isolation and contract company. Friendship provides a natural support structure the Muslim community. Therefore we should ensure that the company we keep helps us in remembering Allah (Subhanahu wa taaala) and strengthens our commitment to Islam. This is more important for us living in the West as the corrupt society continuously bombards us with its bad culture and attempts to catch us in its net.